The Jack Noodle Journal

This morning I was figuring some simple math

When we were first together I was

20
Years old
Multiplied by
2
Add
1

When I am
41
Years old
I’ll have spent more of my life with you than without you

You will be
38
Then

Some simple words to match the simple math
Ups downs
Goods bads
Happys sads

When I met our boy I was

36
Years old
Multiplied by
2
Add
1

When I am
73
Years old
I’ll have spent more of my life with the boy than without the boy

You will be
70
Then

I will have loved you
73
Years
By then

Biting off your own tongue.
Blistering boils, stumps of burnt hair.
Chopping your hand off with a dull axe.
Drowning in a swimming pool of blood and piss.
Drinking dog puke from a brown paper bag.
Eating the intestines of your uncle three months dead.
Falling into barbwire covered in skunk fat.
Pulling out your fingernails.
Pulling off your eyelids.
Shattering a wine glass of lemon juice on your bare back.
Shattering bones, compound fractures poking through skin.
Sitting on a nail.
Sleeping on a pillow filled with possum roadkill.
Snapping off your teeth and chewing them to dust.
Sniffing steaming swine semen.
Sticking a tree branch too far into your nose.
Sticking a tree branch too far into your ear.

Where does this come from?

We watch his film and wonder.
Distinguished older gentleman seemingly pleasant, shy, charming, joyful, peaceful, kind.
Crafter of bizarre, horribly confused, disturbed, demonic and vile images.
Are we witness to a cracked brain at work on screen?

Is there a secret here?

Purging of the ugly, for focusing on the beauty.
Outing of the hurtful, making room for the hopeful.
Spewing of the darkness, letting in the light.
Bloodletting of the artistic, exorcising the disgusting.

Extracting the weeds so the daisies can breath.

Rats can tread water for three days
Not sure how it was discovered or how they measure
Legs kicking, arms thrashing to stay above the waves

Struggling to stay afloat the pressure on my chest weighs
I can tread water like this for months maybe longer
Rats can tread water for three days

Tomorrow is the same as yesterday when today fades
Popping back up, now sinking down under
Legs kicking, arms thrashing to stay above the waves

A fit of fights over and over on the screen plays
Having trouble speaking, mouth fills sinking deeper
Dirty rats tread water for three days

Can’t see the shore, still any bit of hope saves
Breathtaking, the taking of breath is murder
Legs kicking, arms thrashing can’t stay above the waves

At least there’s this and perseverance pays
It can’t be like this forever, soon it will get better
Some rats tread water for three days
Legs stopping, arms resting sink under the waves

I have been keeping myself fairly entertained over the last couple of weeks. That’s what we are supposed to be doing right? Keeping ourselves in a constant state of entertainment? As stupid, fat, lazy, Americans I would say staying entertained is pretty easy to do. Staying entertained with material of a quality worth blogging about seems to be getting more and more difficult though.

I am in absolute love with the album, “Embryonic” by the Flaming Lips! Yes, yes, I know Mike had mentioned to me that there was some Flaming Lips action worth checking out a few months ago. Their version of “The Dark Side of the Moon” is pretty awesome as well. The Flaming Lips is one of those bands that I want to really like. They are often hit or miss with me. Embryonic hit all of my buttons. Some really good sounds and trippy psychedelia.

Hmmm… Now I wonder if this stuff is just catching me at the perfect time and matching my mood?

For example: I watched “Avatar” in the movie theater the other day and thought it was spectacular! Maybe the movie caught me on the right day? I did go and see it by myself so I didn’t have any friends or family nay saying anything as I left the theater.

It’s so funny. Everybody bemoans the poor storyline and cheesiness of Avatar. Really? I thought we were done with good storylines? Didn’t everybody just give up after the Matrix sequels? Why does everybody think they deserve master storytelling now when it comes to Avatar?

You go to see Avatar for the amazing visuals!

I will say, don’t bother seeing it if you don’t see it in a movie theater in all of it’s 3D glory. The visuals and the 3D effects really are mesmerizing. I can’t imagine ever renting it for home viewing. You could probably really see the thread bare storyline if you get the DVD from Netflix and don’t have the stunning 3D to hypnotize you.

Whoa… sidetracked there… Back to the music:

I have been listening to the albums from the top 50 of 2009 list on the Hype Machine website. I have been discovering some great stuff that I missed from 2009! Full disclosure, or from the credit where credit is due department, I think the Shelton Twins were the first ones to turn me on to the site’s 2008 list.

I put the Yeah Yeah Yeah’s CD, “It’s Blitz!” on hold at the library. That album gets more awesome with every listen.

Also I am really digging “Fever Ray” by Fever Ray. Check out the crazy gorgeous videos here. I put that CD on my library holds list as well.

An album not on the Hype Machine top 50 list but on my library holds list is the newest Kings of Convenience album, “Declaration of Dependence” . I love those sweet Norwegian lads. Their video for “Boat Behind” sums it up nicely for me.

Maybe in the right mood.

On the TV front we have the major, major news story of the final season of LOST finally hitting the small screen! Yep. Pretty exciting for us here at the Noodle compound.

I don’t know though… I’ve seen the first 2 episodes (3 if you count the first night as a 2 parter) and I think I’m going to have to wait and see. I think that the show has been so magnificent at their gut wrenching season finales that their season premiere openers can’t really keep up with the hype that the viewers build up for it in their heads.

I am a tad underwhelmed at this point in the season. Actually, I think I felt the exact same way at the beginning of last season.

We’ll see.

Come on though, more new characters? New other other others?

It is the last season of the series and I’m sure they’ll wrap it up nicely.

Maybe LOST hasn’t caught me in the right mood yet this season.

the end of the hall
no more to see here today
head back and reflect

When they put you under
we were waiting in the hall.
Filled with worry but also wonder.
Legs trembling thought I would fall.
Doctor came to get us set.
Everything was going as planned.
Said you were telling how we first met
to all the surgeons who were on hand.
Please stop. Don’t tell me this.
Doctor’s words punched me in the chest.
Real emotion too sudden to dismiss.
My aching heart shocked from it’s rest.
Those tears were honest then.
Now I know they can come again.

“I am still learning!”
He bellows into his microphone.
He peels an apple on stage.
The razor sharp knife sparks in the light.
The audience is startled then amazed.

His words spray the page like a shotgun blast.
One day the words will form an order.
One day the words will make a rhyme.
One day the words will make a meaning.

For now he practices.
The words spill out.
He will pick up speed.

“Distaste for the well dressed man doesn’t level with my desire for a three hundred foot yacht.”

In the audience a whisper. A chuckle. A cough.

“You will covet my coat of many colors!”

“This is not the joke.”

“One day you will waddle in the shadow of my magnificence.”

He loves that they look at him.
He loves to stare right back.
He looks them all in the eye.

“I am everything!”

He takes his notebook and pencil out.

He writes:
“I will destroy you.”

He erases it.
Pauses.
Then rewrites:

“I will fucking destroy you.”

Heeelooo there.

Yeah I guess it would be the doldrums. Maybe that’s it. It has been sunny a couple of times here this week and that’s good. It hasn’t seemed very cold yet this season either has it? Oh man, why did I just jinx it?

In an interesting juxtaposition yesterday (well, maybe for the nerd set), the Apple keynote was yesterday and so was Obama’s first State of the Union speech. The Twitter universe was a buzz.

I had to watch both the next day since I didn’t see either one on the day they happened.

I do try and catch Apple’s keynote most every year. Try to make an event of it. I’m not sure why. Remember 2007’s keynote and how excited I was. Introduction of the iPhone. I wonder if you can still watch that one. Yep. Now that was an entertaining keynote.

This year we have the introduction of the iPad. Yeah, I don’t know. Looks pretty cool. I won’t be running right out and buying one though. It took me a couple of years to get an iPod. I still don’t have an iPhone. I think I might have a touch of Apple cynicism. iCynic. I will be pretty excited to check it out at the Apple store.

After using my Droid so much for internet surfing and using my laptop less now, I can see that the iPad would be all one would need for computing at home really. That’s kind of weird. Keeping your monster powerful desktop at the office and keeping your dinky iPad for home computing. This guy I follow on Twitter pondered it well in this blog post I thought. Oh this one looks pretty good too.

I am a firm believer of not buying the first generation of anything. Wait, I did buy the first gen Droid though didn’t I. hmmm… Well I don’t buy the first generation of anything starting… now!

The State of the Union Address was fine. Overall it was pretty much a downer. I am still glad Obama is at the helm a year into it. Some people aren’t. I don’t know if he is going to be able to do anything he’s talking about, but I am more comfortable thinking of him in the White house than I was with W.

He said some good stuff. The parts at the end where he talked about people’s cynicism (hey iCynic again) and change was fairly encouraging.

I am sick to death of politics and politicians though, that’s for sure. Both sides of the aisle. I wish everybody would shut up. Bunch of smarmy assholes! If I may be so blunt. These long drawn out hard times have really sucked out whatever charm, humor and interest politics ever held for me and left a screen of static. Makes me sick.

I wish, I wish things would hurry up and get better in the economy, the country and job markets. There’s some folks out there in need of flip offs not possible to give in this climate of hunkering down. Wha…?

In more positive news: I am taking some free poetry courses online. Check out the classes at The Open University. Awesome stuff. I have been enjoying my poetry making. I’m working on getting educated on how it really works so I can get some solid stuff pumped out.

Hmmm… A grammar class would be a good investment.

In “oh yeah that website” news, a coworker reminded me about this website. The Hype Machine’s top 50 albums of 2009! You can listen to entire albums! Lots of things I had been curious about hearing and other stuff I didn’t even know about.

Great site to help with doldrums combat.

Oh yes! What about next Tuesday? The final season of LOST starts up with a two hour season premiere! I can’t wait for that. I think I need to watch the last 3 episodes of last season between now and then to get prepared.

New episodes of LOST will shake off some of the winter blues and keep us a little bit warmer.

One hundred please.
He colors in the circles.
Rows and rows of circles.
He says they are apples,
but the crayon is
purple.

One hundred rotations.
Passing by with
a click and a thump and a click.
click, thump, click
click, thump, click
He adjusts the rollers,
pours some fluid on them.

The machine is a massive giant
crouching down.
One hundred tons ready to pounce.
Iron jaws fall open and
one hundred burning babies run out.
Dance about and struggle
to keep their flames.

Bounce up in time with
one hundred beating hearts.
click, thump, click
click, thump, click

Ninety-nine slashes
on the side of his tank.
Into the camera smiling,
pixelated grin.
Say hello to folks back home.
He doesn’t get what you’re trying,
just knows it’s not rhyming.

One hundred thunder claps,
Desires punch holes in the sky.
Makes Earth shake quakes.
Takes more man than me
to run this machine.
This is the year we will get
One hundred of these.

Oh dear Joe Wheeler,
Show stopper, the deft scene stealer.
I hope, I hope I can remember the lines.
Only now do I understand the signs.
Veteran, master, mentor, sage.
A mystic meant for a different age.

Bearded massage parlors of dissonance.
Whittle away hours for a few dollars and cents.
How’s Donna? Say hello to Terry.
Carpool miles jammed traffic will bury.
Talks of rebellion ride in the patrol.
Sit at our stations as the work day takes it’s toll.

Oh come now drunken Santa, make merry rhyme.
Fumbling the muse, I’m the poet this time.
Now on the stage of my history,
You kept the spinning of words a mystery.
Irradiated poet nuclear poems you make,
But now from you the words I will take.